As a rule, my mother wasn’t a superstitious person. She did, however, hesitate to turn around once a journey was started. Her mom said it was bad luck. My grandmother also made sure to call on New Year’s Eve to remind us not to wash clothes and “wash away” a loved one in the coming year. And New Year’s Day we always had greens, black eyed peas, and hog jowl for supper— greens for money in the coming year, black eyed peas for luck,and pork for prosperity and forging ahead. Mama was also careful to remind us on New Year’s that whatever we did on the first day of the year, we were bound to do all year long.
I love New Year’s Day and the idea of a whole new year stretching out in front of me, a perfect sheet of blank paper to be filled in whatever way I see fit. As I do before my birthday, then again on the day of it, I always spend some time contemplating what I want to accomplish in the year to come. I think about who I want to be and who I want to become, and in many ways, that means I think about how I want to feel in the coming year (consider reading The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte). Then I gear the first day of my shiny new year toward working on things that will point me in the right direction.
This year I want to feel CREATIVE, so I am writing now, and later I will paint or draw— if only for a few minutes. I have cleaned up my creative space already today, and later this year I will make a legitimate studio and office space filled with things that inspire me and ways to stay organized and neat.
I also want to feel CONNECTED, to the ones I love, to this beautiful world, to the past and the future. Because I couldn’t call each and every person I care dearly about, I sent a text to most (I’m sure I forgot someone… or a few someones.), and I spent some time feeling the cold air on my face and the frosty grass beneath my shoes this morning. Best of all, I started the day with some snuggles with my hunnies.
CONTRIBUTIVE. Yes, I know this isn’t a real word, but “contributory” didn’t quite fit what I wanted. I want to feel like I contribute to the greater good. Generous. Kind. Integral. I’m still working on how I want this to come about, but I’m starting the year with this attitude as a mindset.
WISE/KNOWLEDGEABLE. I want to know my shit and know I know my shit. Confidence can be as much of an issue as anything…
STRONG. Have you ever thought about how much this word encompasses? I want all of that. I want to be able to move heavy things — physically , emotionally, and intellectually. I want to feel the certainty of that strength.
And I want to feel MAGICAL. This is the thing that I want to flutter like lightning bugs around my existence this year — laughter and love, slow sunsets and stargazing, fairy lights and candle lights, a beautiful soundtrack and perfect silence. Magic. I want to feel magic.
This story and all related material are the original works of Estora Adams. All rights reserved.